I'm constantly surprised how money not onley reveals our true colours but often brings out the best or worst in us.

Normally calm and cool individuals, when faced with poverty or a request to help, can get totally defensive jittery or rude. If someone suppresses their pride and dignity to the point of asking you for help, at least have the maturity and humanity to decline in a respectful manner.

Simple aint it? "Can you help?" says the one, "no, i can't- sorry" says the other. And no one has to feel bad or upset.

When people dont want to help they show a lot about themselves. I say dont want to help, because in the cases of a person that wants to help, but does not have resources, the vibe is normally respectful and nice.

If someone ever asks you for something, please try to remember that that does not turn you into God. Everything you have, you also received; some of it earned, most of it as a gift- either of nuture/God or from your family/social connections. So, being in a position where someone asks you for something, is a scenario which should make you humble and grateful- not bratty.

Then there is the flip side: those people who, when the pressure is on, show their amazing true colours- again and again. They do it for intrinsic reasons, they dont freak out if they dont get enough thank you's and they dont even expect or demand those thank you's. Their gifts are: gifts. Their contributions are not down payments on a clean conscience or songs of praise- just gifts, freely, with a smile.

The advanced class: to give even when your giving is met with a 'fuck you' - sometimes as a literal reply, sometimes through attitudes and events that will tempt you to pull back and stop.

Im so tempted to mention names of all the above parties, but I obviously wont. Some make endless promises but never delivers, others start and get tired if there's not enough ego/emotional massaging in return, some just don't give a shit. Then there are the ones who repeatedly reveal an unselfishness that makes me believe in the notion of altruism. And Im very glad to have a few of these heroes in my life, because they stop me from giving up. And I am often, very often tempted to simply give up.

I dont mind having friends in need of money. I dont mind personal sacrifice. What I do mind is the crap attitudes and unsympathetic indiference I see in the most privileged of individuals.

Again, when it comes to money, there is NO problem to say NO. There is a problem if your refusal or acceptance to give turns you into an asshole.